Oh my goodness y'all....
Was going to ask Cortes to come with me to an event tonight but I got stunlocked out of the entire conversation because we were wearing the same outfit somehow someway. How does that happen..... Felt like it meant something (and not anything good) like to spend so long thinking about how to dress when seeing a Guy and then you two are wearing the exact same clothes,, you're joking. Something needs to be done.
Didn't want to go to the event ANYWAY!!! I'm pretty sure he was going to be busy too so I don't know why I even wanted to ask??? Besides being part of my 300 step plan to get incrementally closer over the next few months? Do you guys think that maybe part of the problem could be how much time i dedicate to making schemes and plans and ruses. Do you guys think perhaps possibly that may contribute to the state of things. Who's to say.
Anyway, I didn't JUST wear that fit for him, it was ALSO because it makes me feel like I'm in Whisper of the Heart and I wanted to feel nice when I did a lil work session in the library. For some reason I always get a wicked headache when I get work done outside of the house, though. I mean, I have a headache like, Most of the time--I have one now!!--so this probably just a coincidence, but it's a little weird. I got a lot done but I left after 90 minutes despite planning on staying longer because I just felt Sick. Also because there was an old lady yelling at one of the librarians....
I got 4 stars of work done today, though!! And barely feel like it.. I gotta keep this momentum going. This really is my Whisper of the Heart moment. Me and my collared shirts and my library work sessions and my some fucking guy on a bike.
House Rules is crazy because once again I didn't realize what I was writing about until I took a second look at it--while tightening up the first scene (which took most of my time today and the thing is still nasty) I realized that Seven is just the most avoidant person alive omg. I mean he's out here with lines like "that was the trouble with having good friends--they were terrific liars, and much too understanding of all the wrong things" and I only realize in the rear view that this is , yk, a pretty major part of his character, and he is actually really emotionally stunted by his whole Situation. I genuinely believed Seven was a pretty actualized character without much to learn but ohhh noo turns out that this one is about the power of friendship or something. Boooooo.
The more I think about the story, the more I realize that House Rules is basically a Skittles love letter, which may not make sense to any of you if you read it but IT IS. IT IS!!!! Which makes me happy, because I remember writing an intent along these lines two years ago: "I want my next project to be a love letter." I have finally achieved this goal!
This is one of Kurt Vonnegut's "rules of writing fiction," too: "Write to please just one person. If you open a window and make love to the world, so to speak, your story will get pneumonia." Which has been on my mind for a while, and I keep asking myself, "who am I writing this for?"
I know this time around. House Rules is just fun. It's kind of stupid, I think, and really goofy and cheesy in a lot of ways. But the reason why all these character sketches became so easily filled in this time around was because each time I either thought "this makes me think of this person" or "I think this person will love it if this happens." I don't think it'll be particularly stunning to anyone, or anything, but I really really hope to achieve my goal of making You [pointing emoji] enjoy yourself for twenty minutes.
I'm doing a bunch of pointless research for the thing, like watching videos of wheellock pistols and looking into feudal French social hierarchies, and I also learned the rules to this 16th century card game called coucou. It's like, a whole Thing in House Rules that Seven and his friends play a lot of cards, and it's sort of affecting me. Someday I will get enough people in a room to play coucou together and return with my findings. It looks like it would be generally pretty boring and if there's one thing I love, it's vaguely boring experiences.